A better question might be, would I want to date someone who thinks everything I believe in is wrong? Most Christians who are very serious about following Christ would rank their religious views as one of the most important things in their lives. Would you want to date someone who couldn’t share with you the most important thing in your life? It seems to me that your conversations would be rather dry and that you would not be able to fully understand each other.
Some Christians think that if they date a non-Christian, that person will eventually become a Christian, so it is okay. Answer me this: when is the last time YOU were personally able to change another person? People don’t change much. I wouldn’t bank on them changing their religious views for you. And do you think they would be sincere? Or could they fake a conversion just to make you happy thus distancing themselves even further from an open, honest relationship with you.
Relationships work better when both parties understand one another. There is a huge disconnect in a relationship between a Christian and a non-Christian that can’t be healthy for the relationship. Find someone who shares your views on the more important things in life, and your relationship will be much more likely to thrive.
January 3rd, 2010 at 10:29 pm
and that kind of thinking is what’s wrong with Christians
February 3rd, 2010 at 12:17 pm
To try to expand a little on what Lee said:
Taking such a judgmental and absolutist approach to something as important (and revelatory) as the human experience of Love is not only a sad denial of a huge part of what life’s experience is but also a thoroughly un-Christian proposition. Jesus did not cast away the gentiles and unbelieving Jews because they didn’t agree with him on everything he thought. In fact, as I recall the point was rather the opposite. The passage the author included about “maybe you think you’ll convert them so it’s ok…” illustrates how he/she is missing the point of love completely. Stop questioning the divine will and plan of your creator God. If you find yourself at the cusp of a relationship with someone who you love for all the right reasons, but they don’t share your faith, why would you discount this providence; this twist of fate; this act of God and try to impose your own assumptive, non scriptural logic to the situation in conflict with what you are feeling. Recognize that if you choose not to pursue the relationship, it is because of YOUR fears and insecurities about YOUR OWN faith and its basis, and not your disapproval of their beliefs.
March 10th, 2010 at 11:09 am
It is impossible for two people that have different views on life to function in a relationship.. An unbeliever.. would never want to date somebody that is a passionate Christian… The unbeliever would feel attacked and judged almost every moment of the relationship.. and the Christian would be forced to compromise their relationship with God for a relationship with a person… The relationship with God is so much more worth it than a relationship with a person.
March 11th, 2010 at 2:21 pm
Bobby,
Your argument is pointless. You presume to say what we believe is non-sensible in not having us enter into a relationship when you have no clue what we would define as a relationship! Furthermore, you also demonstrate of knowing nothing about what drives us. Not to mention, our definitions of love probably and sorely differ. Yet, in all of this I can only guarantee no lasting contentment or fulfillment.
April 17th, 2010 at 6:49 am
i’m an atheist. i don’t feel hostile toward god(s) or a person’s belief in them. i am very committed to my christian partner and he is just as committed to me. sometimes i feel judged, yes, but i love him enough to ACCEPT HIS BELIEFS as a part of who he is. and vice versa, my lack of religious faith does not particularly bother him. if you want to judge us, then do so, but i can’t say i care for the opinions of someone closed-minded enough to seriously base their opinions of a person and their worth according to faith. we’re all people, and i don’t see why we can’t be happy together just because i don’t believe in his god.